Grayish?

It’s interesting the way a child’s mind works. So simple at times yet so complicated. Or maybe it’s because I’m an adult I think it’s complicated. I guess they do tend to be pretty basic. Anyway that’s not my point at all.

The other day my girlfriend sent me an article about Mercury being in retrograde and that it essentially makes people kind of crazy. I believe it. Usually I am the epitome of understanding and patience but lately when it comes to other children I’d like to punch them. Not all but some. I know it’s terrible of me to say but I’m being honest. Let me throw this disclaimer out there, I would never punch anyone, especially a child. And again, back to my point.

Something happened today while we were at a birthday party. I overheard a conversation between my daughter, Lily, and another little girl ( a bit older than Lily). She asked Lily if her family was grayish. I could tell by Lily’s lack of response that she had no idea what the little girl was talking about. My hubby heard and was a bit thrown by the whole exchange, I think. I quickly jumped in for a couple reasons. First, I knew she would continue down this path and I knew Lily wouldn’t quite catch on to the line of questioning. Second, I wanted to have the conversation with her and not let it be left hanging in the balance. Clearly she was having thoughts about our family but maybe wasn’t sure who to ask.

I asked her if I had heard correctly that she asked Lily if her family was “grayish.” She said yes and immediately started to shy away. I told her it was a legitimate question and she should not be embarrassed. I said, “Did you ask that because I’m black and David is white?” Of course her response was a big nod of the head.

I took a breath and figured out how to approach the subject swiftly and to the point. No need to make a big deal out of it. I decided to use paint. I asked her to take look at my skin and said to her, “Well it’s not really black is it?” She shook her head no and I pointed out that my skin color was actually brown. I asked her if you mix brown paint with white paint what color do you get. Of course her answer was gray 🙂 but I’m thinking she might have felt a bit put on the spot. I continued on that we actually wouldn’t get gray but a lighter version of the darker color and that’s what our family is. She got it…I think.

We are all different shades. We talk about being color blind and how we shouldn’t judge by ones skin color. But have we forgotten that when someone’s skin color isn’t the same as ours questions might arise? Maybe for most adults it’s not a big deal but we have to make sure for the young minds just learning the world we accept their questions with open hearts.

Oh and don’t worry I didn’t want to punch this beautiful mind with such a true question.

Mom Fail: Bunny

LAL were given bunnies when I was pregnant. Liam and Lily love their bunnies beyond belief while Audrey could take it or leave it. Here is where my fail comes in.

Last week my friend gave us coupons to the circus. I figured, why not? The kids would get in free! How could I deny my munchkins their first circus? We planned to go but had the usual “try to get out of the house drama.” Lil and Liam both asked to bring their bunnies and I said no. Cue the tears. From both of them. So I folded in an effort to get out of the house. I told them both bunny was their responsibility and if they lose it, it’s on them.

We made it to the circus. Amidst the complaining it was too loud and the general needs of a four year when out in public we got through it. There were elephants, tigers ( we missed them because we were a but late), aerialists, clowns, motorcycles and the usual things you find at a circus. It was a nice afternoon. And of course once we left, LAL talked about how much they loved the circus. That through me for a loop because while under the tent Audrey was the only one mesmerized. Anyway we got into the car and Liam asked, “where’s bunny?” I said, “I don’t know. Where IS bunny?” He looked in the car, and we recounted getting into the car. At this point I couldn’t remember whether he had actually brought it or not. Then he said he had left it at home and didn’t bring it. I trusted his word though and we waited for parking lot traffic to die down.

I wish I had taken them back into look for bunny. Part of me knew it wasn’t at home but the girls were complaining and I just couldn’t be bothered. I also had the wherewithal, halfway through the show I thought to look around where we were sitting to make sure no bunnies were floating around. Then again as we were leaving I turned back to check again and there was nothing. This is why I believed he hadn’t brought it. When we got home bunny wasn’t home. Liam everyday since tells me how much he misses bunny and he doesn’t think he will ever see bunny again. It makes me so sad to my little guy hurting. He such a sweet boy. I wish I had just sucked it up and gone back in. Who knows if we would have found bunny but at least I would have tried. I know time will mend his broken heart but I wonder about mine. I feel like I failed my little guy.

Bad Guy Potion

The other morning Liam asked me if the bad guys were still here. I asked him, “What bad guys?” He looked at me and said, “Remember mama, we were on the stairs and they were behind us and they made us invisible?” At first, I was going to brush it off and disregard the bad guys. Then I thought about the night before.

Liam had come into our room several times. He came and snuggled with me for a bit and then took him back to his bed. A few minutes later he came back asking me to sit with him. I groggily obliged. Liam laid with his eyes wide open looking from side to side. He told me he didn’t like the star above his head so I turned ladybug (one of the best gifts we’ve ever gotten, thank you Jess) to give him new stars and he started to drift.

He must have had a bad dream. I told him the bad guys were gone and they won’t be coming back. He asked how I knew they weren’t going to come back. I said, “Well we’re going to make bad guy potion.” He was intrigued.

I ran down to the basement, grabbed some glitter, a few beads, glycerin and a spray bottle. First, I let each munchkin choose a “special jewel.” Next, I added water to the spray bottle and let them each shake some glitter into the bottle then their special jewel. After they did their jobs, I put in a few drops of glycerin so the sparkles don’t settle right away.

Now for the bad guy potion ritual. We all stood in front of the front door and they each sprayed one spray in front of the door. Then we went to the back door and sprayed that door. I figured the two major entrances should cover it. I told them the potion would travel all over the outside of the house and it was impenetrable to bad guys. Last but not least w had to seal the shield by eating ice cream!

The next day Liam asked me if I saw any bad guys last night. I said I had not and asked if he had. With a big smile, he said, “No.”

Job done!!

The Day After Christmas

‘Twas the day after Christmas and all through house…yeah that’s all I got. But it really is the day after Christmas and it was a wonderful day!! LAL had a day filled with, cars, princesses, books, puzzles and most importantly family. David’s sister, mom and step father came over to spend the day with us.

Now that Christmas is over its time to reflect. A couple of weeks ago, I was talking with a friend about the magic of Christmas. We were saying how, as adults, we get caught up in what did you get for whom, where we have to go, how are we going to afford everything we want to buy, are the kids going to be happy, etc… That’s not very magical. It’s so easy to get caught up in the what, rather than the who and why.

Last year I went crazy and bought LAL tons, too much to be completely honest. It was chaos here and talk about over stimulation. We made a decision at that point to keep Christmas simple going forward. My strategy this year was three gifts each plus stocking stuffers. Surprisingly, I actually kept to it!! I’m proud of myself. Christmas morning was much more manageable. They all loved their presents. Smiles all around.

Back to the magic. After that conversation, I figured maybe I should start making some magic and seeing the magic that is right under my nose. First, in an effort to teach LAL Christmas is not only about them, we took a charity ornament off the tree at the Y. We purchased a coat for a young boy. It’s definitely becoming more of a challenge telling three toddlers we’re not purchasing for them. But after some explaining they understood. We also made gifts for their grandparents along the lines of this from Pinterest. Sadly I think it only works with black permanent marker. We tried it with colored and it didn’t work out so well.

Something else that always warms my heart are Christmas lights. I personally don’t enjoy crazy over the top light displays. I’m more of a simple elegance type girl. This is how I decorated our house

I love seeing a lit up Christmas tree through people’s windows.

Every once in a while marketing teams hit the nail on the head with their holiday commercials. Here are my three favorites. Two of the three are from this. The coffee commercial is from a few years ago but never ceases to get me choked up.
Coffee

Air freshener

Computer

Though these commercials did not make me run out and purchase their merchandise, I do think they are very special.

And last but not least, Christmas PJs!!!!!! I don’t know why but for some reason I LOVE Christmas jammies. I’ve always done it for LAL but this year I stepped it up a notch and got them for David and I, too!!

I hope you found the magic in your own special way.

Love That Dirty Water?

I’ve lived in New England for over 15 years. As I’ve mentioned before it has taken me close to 12 years to feel like I really fit in here. Actually it wasn’t until I had LAL that I stopped moaning about wanting to move back to NJ. I think it took me having children to find a group of people that I could relate to. In no way am I discounting friendships I have made during the first 12 years but, I do have a couple of true friends that I met early on and I am grateful for them. But sadly with the majority there was a common thread, anyone I thoroughly enjoyed spending time with left New England. One thing to know about this region is that it’s roots run deep.

To be completely honest I haven’t fully given myself to New England but am I starting to come around. I will always be a Jersey girl, I will always say “cawfee” and I will never say “pahk” nor will my children for that matter (I’ve already started the correction of the silent R). Over the summer we took LAL to the Museum of Science, we always park on the top level of the garage, and this is what I saw

I thought to myself who could not enjoy something so beautiful. I even sent a text to my Jersey girls showing them that photograph saying I might be starting to like Massachusetts. Flash forward to the past two weeks, I posted these photos…

And

I see progress being made if I am taking photos AND posting them, of my munchkins in anything other than NY or NJ sports gear. With all this being said, after the events of the Boston marathon this year I can say it is only fitting that the Boston Red Sox won the World Series, in Boston. I am a part of Boston, Boston is a part of me. I have lived my pain of the marathon as have many others their own. I am Boston Strong, we are Boston Strong. This is exactly what this city needed. So, do I love that dirty water? I cannot say love just yet but I am starting to like it!

Embracing Fall

I usually dislike the arrival of fall. I tend to blow right past it and think about what is to come. Winter. Living in New England during the winter months can be a mixed bag, it might be mild (once every 7-10 years) or it might be miserable with snow…lots of snow. I thoroughly dislike snow. That’s what I think about. Because of this, completely miss the leaves changing, apple picking, apple cider, pumpkin this and pumpkin that. Then I had LAL. Because of them, I told myself to cherish every moment to the best of my ability, I am seeing the beauty in fall or as Lily tells me “some people call it autumn.”

Now that they are three, they get excited when the house is decorated for the season. Last year I had a couple of things for fall. Honestly, it looked slightly pathetic. This year the merchandiser in me resurfaced and I had some fun. I decorated our front porch and the foyer.

My mother-in-law cleaned out her attic a few weeks ago and I found that amazing clay pumpkin in the dumpster she hired. I couldn’t believe it. So I dove in! I love it! And I love free!! The cornstalks are from our garden. Free as well!! The pumpkins and mums I purchased at Trader Joe’s for about $35.00 for three fairy pumpkins and three mums. I don’t know if I got a deal on those, they were convenient.

Everything on the window sill I purchased from Christmas Tree Shoppes a couple years ago after season. We pass a house in the way to school that is all decked out Halloween style and Liam has started asking me if we can make our house look like that one. I told him after Halloween we can get some more decorations for next year because that’s the best time to buy. He was cool with that answer, thankfully.

The table sign, witch and scarecrow came from Christmas Tree Shoppes. And the votive holders, votives, and candy corn were from the Dollar Tree. The plastic pumpkins LAL had gotten last year from somewhere and I decided to keep them. The look on LAL’s faces was priceless! They love it!

We also went apple picking!!! This was my first time, ever, I think. Maybe in Brownies or something but I don’t remember. So this was my first time. It was a time though LAL were over it in about five minutes. I secretly was happy having to be the one to pick the apples. I would show you pictures but I took them with my good camera and have no way to put them on my iPad since none of my computers work. Someday maybe. Anyway, what to do with a peck of apples other than eat them as is. Make apple hand pies!!!! I worried how this would work out for me but they were delicious!!! And ridiculously easy. Thank you Pinterest. I used cortland apples, yum, yum, yummy!!

So if you’re like I was and tend to fly through fall, slow down, take a look, and appreciate the season.

And It Begins…

Well we did it. LAL are in school! I originally had decided not to send them to school this year and keep them with me for another year. Then I came to my senses. I was a bit late coming to this decision (hence why I call myself “Last minute Lucy” I work better under pressure), like August late. David, as he always does, just road the roller coaster until I got to the final stop.

I wasn’t sure I wanted to send them to school this year because its early. At least in my mind its early. I’m sure there are people out there who consider three and a half to be late but I’m not one of them. In my mind, this is the beginning of the end. They are going to be in school for the next 15+ years! Why start it now? And believe me I know it’s not the end, but I’m speaking in regard to them being home with me. Part of me wants to keep them in our little bubble forever.

Then one day I heard myself yelling, I don’t normally yell. I am usually the epitome of patience, thank you grandma Mary (everyone says she had the patience of Job)!!! But I have noticed a difference in myself since the day after they turned three (that’s a whole other story for a different day), I have had less patience than normal. This is what got me to realize I do not have the capability to stimulate my three three year olds enough anymore. It made me sad to think that I wasn’t enough for my children. But the reality is, I know if I’m getting irritated by typical three year old behavior it’s time to call in reinforcements. It can only benefit all involved. I obviously knew I wasn’t always going to be the only one to shape their beautiful little minds but I guess I wasn’t expecting it to come so soon.

Three and a half years have gone by so quickly it’s unbelievable. Everyone says how quickly time passes and I wondered if I was rushing time by sending them to school. I still don’t know the answer to that but the decision has been made. The best I can do is stick by the choice we made and go with the flow.

Their first day of school went well. I had always thought I’d be the mother hysterically crying while my kids were throwing up the peace sign burning rubber with their sneakers. That’s not how it went. We had had a rough morning so I was actually not sad at all to see them off to school. What got me was pulling into the parking lot and seeing David’s car. He surprised us! He had sent me a really lovely message in the morning so I didn’t even think it would be an option for him to come. He did and I got a bit emotional. LAL loved it! They were so happy to see their daddy at their new school. I have a good man. We all walked into their classroom (they’re all in the same class) together they showed him a couple of things. Lily and Liam birth said, “bye mommy, bye daddy” and Audrey had more and more things to show us but then her teacher caught her attention and we slipped out. Flash forward two and a half hours, I seriously mean flash, those are the quickest two and a half hours EVER! We picked them up and all was good. LAL enjoyed their first day of school!! The days since have been a mixed bag, a cut lip, some tears but nothing major. I think all will be good sooner rather than later.

Girlfriends

Over the past ten days I have had the pleasure of seeing my closest girlfriends. Last weekend was a laugh filled weekend with my five of my oldest girlfriends, in Rhode Island. We all live on the east coast between Charlotte, NC and Boston. During the week, I visited with two wonderful girlfriends of mine from this area. And this weekend, my oldest sister with my nieces and my dear friend and her husband came up from the tri-state area. That’s a whole bunch of girlfriends and I have loved every moment of every visit.

Being a mom to three three year olds is no easy task. I wear many different hats on any given day, wife, mother, chauffeur, chef, and referee to name a few. Never do I get to wear just one hat, I am always multitasking. Needless to say it is exhausting and it is very easy to forget about the first hat, my “me” hat. What I’ve learned over the past three years is that letting my me hat get buried underneath the others is no good. This is where girlfriends come in.

I am fortunate enough to have dear friends whom I’ve known since I was born and some I’ve met just recently. These woman don’t judge me. They are genuine people that only want the best for me. These are the ladies that know if I don’t call them for six months, it is not because anything is wrong but because life is busy. And some, we might only see once a year but within milliseconds of that first big long hug we fall right back into it like were just together yesterday. We talk about everything from, what we think famous people are like when cameras are off to gardening tips to instant coffee.

Girlfriends are so very special and so very important to me. So to my girlfriends, thank you for being there for me…always! I love you dearly! XOXO

Hair’s The Story

When people first see LAL, after the initial inquiry about them being triplets and telling me I have my hands full (I wish I could get paid for every time somebody said that to me) nine times out of ten the next comment is about their hair. Ten times out of ten people cannot believe they each have totally different types of hair.

As you can see, Liam has wavy almost straight hair, Audrey has loose curls and Lily has tight corkscrew curls. All completely different but each equally as beautiful and fitting for their personalities. Personally, I have never been intrigues by the fact that they have different hair textures. It actually make sense…they are individuals!!! People tend to forget this when triplets are at hand. It is no different than singleton siblings having different thickness, textured, or colored hair. Just because my munchkins happen to have been born within two minutes of each other does not mean they are the same person. Even identical multiples are not the same. Anyway, I could talk all day about peoples misconceptions regarding multiple birth children but that’s not what this post is about.

This post is about my daughter Lily.

My lovely Lily lulu bell. She’s my oldest daughter, even if only by one minute and ninety seconds. I call her my old soul. A couple of months ago my sweet girl said something to me that instantly broke my heart. She said, “Mommy I want hair like Rere.” I wanted to cry. I didn’t because I didn’t want her to see how sad it made me. So I responded the best I knew how. I said, “but Lulu you’re hair is beautiful.” I went on to explain that Rere’s hair was hers and Lily’s hair was hers. And though they are different they are equally as wonderful. I talked about everybody being different and it is those differences that make people unique and special in their very own way.

Now I have been expecting this. Well, not this exactly, more like, “mom I want the jeans that she has” or something of that nature around the age of 13. Not hair, at the age of three!!!! Lily’s hair gets a ton of positive attention. I mean it is pretty amazing. She can do awesome things like this:

And this

I know it’s human nature to want what we don’t have. I’m sure with time she’ll realize how special her hair is but until then we will continue to tell her how beautiful and special her hair is. And how it is just one more thing that makes her who she is.